As we know, cycling has its own rich lexicon. Words with etymologies built over decades. This expansive vocabulary extends to a wealth of insults too, some of which we have listed here. And they’re just about fit for family viewing. You need to harden up mate. Glass cranker! Amateur!
Half wheeler. Some may actually see this as a badge of honor, rather than an insult. But I think, most of us would rather not have this as a label, as it singles you out as the type of rider who no one wants to sit on the front with. And I think we all know a few. Often accompanied by an expletive as a suffix, prefix, or both.
Sit on sprinter.
We are not talking about the pro seater here with the riders who are paid to get an on chair ride to the finish, before opening up in the last 200 meters. More the type of rider who won’t give a single turn in a local road race, chain gang, or even on a club ride, skulking around at the back, before lighting it up to win a town sign, and celebrating like they’ve won the worlds. “In your face, yeah.”
Amateur doesn’t sound too bad of an insult in the face of it, but this one, especially to the purists, really does cut to the core if you’re on the receiving end, as it implies that your skills and abilities as a rider as far from being pro. Yet, you don’t need to be a pro to call someone else an amateur. Because actual amateurs, more often than not, call fellow amateurs amateurs too.
Sandbagger is in the front, aimed at those riders who seemingly aren’t partial to putting their nose in the wind. And who will avoid a turn on the front at all costs. To this end, they’ll employ a variety of underhand tactics to keep their slot at the back of the group, much to the annoyance of all around them.
Is a moniker for riders whose main aim appears to be hitting the road hard at the weekend, but not actually in a race or sportive, as the WWs tend to take these very seriously indeed.
Poser, this one doesn’t need much of an explanation, as I think we can all point to at least one person we know who fits this particular description. You know the one. Immaculate pro kit. Bling bike under the UCI weight limit. Box-fresh cycling shoes, balled up legs, dark shades, whatever the weather, and always, always checking their hair.
You need to harden up
You need to harden up. This disparagement is usually reserved for those who tend to moan, complain, or offer up paltry excuses for their inability to ride or cope with any modest level of arduosity. No. No, I don’t think it’s safe. There is a 5% chance of rain, and that’s 5% more than I’m willing to risk. I’m not doing it. I’m going to phone my wife. I need to get a lift. I’ll tell you what. You need to harden up mate. You really, really do. I can’t believe this. Do you mind if I borrow your gilet to keep warm whilst I wait? I don’t want to get cold. I’ve had enough.
Unbelievable. Wheelsucker, no one wants to be called a wheelsucker, do they? We even made a video about how to get rid of one. In French they have a wonderful word for wheelsucker. Raton! [foreign language] raton! Not a literal translation at all, it actually means “young rat”.
Glass cranker, a name given to a rider who rides through to the front in a breakaway, whilst pedaling so softly, when at the front, they could actually be using cranks made of glass. Such is the withering emptiness of their effort. For example,
-What you are doing?
-Look at the little ring!
-But you look really strong!
-Yeah, but look at you! We’re going downhill, and you ‘re on 39/17.
-Go on, do a turn.
-I’m not doing a turn. I’ve just done a turn, you glass cranker!
I was called cheesehead once for attacking just as the flag dropped in the Tour de I’Avenir, by a Belgian rider who also threw a bread roll at me.
The top ten cycling insults are mentioned above. So if you want to be gentleman in cycling, do remember the ten insults. And forbid doing them. Half wheeler! Sit on sprinter! Amateur! Sandbagger!Weekend warriors! Poser! You need to harden up!Wheelsucker! Glass cranker! Cheesehead! Anyways, if someone’s behavior annoys you while it’s not included when cycling, write down on the comment area.